Hope

Two weeks from today, I will be in a city I have wanted to be in ever since I was six. To be quite honest, I haven't thought much about it, because if I do, I will try and figure out the logistics myself. This all changed recently.

Two and half weeks ago it was Easter weekend. I went to a Good Friday service, something I have not done since I was a teenager. It was humbling. The friday before the resurrection is always a day where I stop and reflect on the supremacy of God, but I never reflect long enough to dig deep into my soul and wonder "How can I ever thank you?" So that's exactly what I did that Friday. In the service and during the prayer time, I realized I do not trust Jesus. I think I do. I believe with everything in me I do. But when I decided to take stock of the things I give him versus the things I do not give him, there are a few things I keep closely to myself. That weekend, I dedicated my hope and trust to the Lord. I made a pact with him that I would not think about my future, where I will live, or how it will happen. He will make it happen, and yes, I ultimately will make the decision but he will lead my heart where it is supposed to be.

In that very weekend, I heard news that a little seven year old girl was re-diagnosed with cancer for the third time in as many years. I have never met Daisy Love, but two years ago two of my residents (who happen to be twins) would always talk about their pastors' little daughter who was battling cancer for the 2nd time within one calendar year. So in May of 2010, I started reading this little girls blog. My heart broke for her, however I was encouraged by the trust and hope her parents found in Jesus. In reading the blog everyday for months, and reading her dad's book, I decided to make Reality LA my home church. It was all because of this little girl and the faith of her community around her that drew me to this church. I have never learned more about the sovereignty and redemption of Christ as I did at Reality. And yes, Jesus is Jesus and his word can be heard anywhere, but I have never been more pointed to faith and total abandonment to the Kingdom than I have at Reality.

Ever since letting Jesus arrest my thoughts and desires and my heart, I have found immeasurable peace. People ask me everyday how it is that I am not freaking out about my trip to the east coast in two weeks. All I can say is, I trust in Jesus.

I trust in Jesus. I trust in him to give me peace on the east coast. I trust Jesus to heal Daisy Love. In him lies my hope.


"By grace He brought me to the place where I could truly say that 'Jesus, you are of more value than even my children and if my daughter dies tomorrow nothing changes between me and you. I still believe that you are God and that you are good. I will still preach you, teach you, and point people to you. Nothing changes. If my daughter dies, you are of surpassing value.'"- Britt Merrick